I used to believe, “Discipline is the only way to get to success.”

And although that seems to be a normal, logical statement that everyone believes in, it’s actually a blocker to our growth and success in life.

The more we believe that discipline is the only way, the more we struggle to get results that would otherwise come to us rather effortlessly.

Here’s why I say that. When you think of the word ‘discipline’, what are the other words you associate with it?

Pain.
Suffering.
Consistency.
Hard Work.
Sacrifice.
Striving.
Force.
Grit.
Exhaustion
Obsession

And a lot more that seem like great qualities (and they are), but put all of them together, and essentially, our lens of looking at success is zoomed in to only one perspective: Success is the result of consistent, hard, and painful suffering in the name of a big goal.

Sounds good as a philosophy. But in real life, that’s BS.

Think about it; when was the last time you willingly said, “Oh, I’ve finally found something that’s going to make me suffer for the next few years, but then the rewards will be massive. I am so happy and excited to go through excruciating pain! Yayyyy!”

I know the answer is never because no human being loves to willingly choose pain. 

Now, this may feel a bit confusing because we glorify all those who shun their temporary desires and suffer for a goal but make a big impact. We admire all those who can do extreme hard work and will their dreams into existence. We look up to all the exceptional people whom we write books and biographies about (and what they detail the most are the struggles they’ve gone through to achieve success).

But when we do that, we create a subconscious barrier: “Oh. They’re exceptional. I am not. So, I can’t really make things happen. There was something special about them.”

That’s the first reason why this idea of discipline being the route to success is a limiting factor in our growth. Before even trying out our dreams, we think, “Oh, I’m too lazy/weak/powerless/inconsistent to even do that.”

And we settle for something way less than our potential.

For years, this is why I struggled to work on my health and weight. I thought, “Ah, getting fit or getting abs is too much hard work and pain. Yes, I would love to get fit, but that feels impossible for me.”

Year after year, I tried new exercises, routines, workout videos, even diets sometimes, but you know how that ultimately goes. A week or two later, I was back to square one, with just a bit more dejection that reinforced my belief that I can’t do it.

But beneath that belief was the notion that success requires discipline.

As I kept learning more about what truly constitutes success, though, I questioned this thought, and I realized it’s a flawed concept.

Discipline (in the traditional sense we think of) never creates success. Consistent effort at a goal does.

Yes, there’s a difference.

When we think of discipline, we think of suffering. So, we wonder, how can all those successful people endure so much suffering?

But they don’t think of discipline as suffering. They love it! They see all the consistent actions they are taking not as punishment they must endure to achieve something, but as a privilege instead—a way to realize their full potential.

I’m not saying that success comes without actions, efforts, or consistency. No matter how ‘strong’ your energies are, sitting on your couch and manifesting won’t do anything.

You must get out into the world and make things happen.

But does that have to be an enduring suffering and punishment that we call discipline? NO!

Tony Robbins says this beautifully, “Pain is required. Suffering is a choice.”

After running a marathon, for example, no one feels like they relaxed their legs on a beach. Everybody feels the pain and exhaustion. But some choose to see it as a beautiful thing that shows how much they are capable of (so happiness, satisfaction, and fun go high), and others choose to see it as suffering (so exhaustion, sacrifice, and other negative emotions go high).

Similarly, when a project at work demands 12 hours of work a day for a few weeks, some groan at how much they’ll have to suffer in that work, while others revel in the possibility of growth they’ll get.

Same situation. Different perspectives. Completely different feelings and outcomes.

In one case, you suffer. In the other, you have fun.

And that’s the real key to success! Not discipline—FUN!

The mistake we make is that we think fun means:

Unproductive
Waste of time
Something you do to relax
Not ‘WORK’
A ‘Reward’ for disciplined effort.

No. Fun is the way to success. When you have the emotions of fun, joy, and lightheartedness while putting in the effort, you do the same work. But instead of feeling burdened and hurt, you feel like you’re having the time of your life!

That’s the way you can take all the consistent actions needed to succeed in any area of your life. Will it be hard? Yes. Will it take effort? Yes. Will it take time? Yes. But will you have fun while you do all that? ALSO, YES!

I was struggling with working out because I only thought of it from the lens of suffering and pain, never as a privilege to become my best version. But recently I shifted that lens. Now I started to believe, “The more I sweat, the more successful I become.”

Instead of thinking of it as pain I must endure, I thought, “How can I make it fun?”

And now, for the first time, every morning, after a high-intensity workout for 35 to 40 minutes, I sprint for 3 minutes straight with one of my favorite songs playing out loud.

I’m the healthiest I have been in the last 1.5 years. And I’ve not suffered for it. For the first time, I’ve truly loved it.

And the effort has become effortless because I can take action without resistance.

In every area of my life, from coaching, writing, content creation, corporate training, or even my friendships, I’ve recognized this pattern: the moment the suffering of discipline ends, and I genuinely start having fun in the process, my resistance levels drop, my actions go through the roof, and even though I’m working hard, I’m flowing through it all!

So, on an emotional level, it doesn’t exhaust me. It fires me up.

And that’s a conscious choice. You can make it too.

So, stop asking, “How do I become more disciplined?” That’s not going to help you. Instead, ask, “How can I have more fun?”

Think about that question. Sit with it. And you’ll be amazed at the magic you create!