JUNE 28, 2020

No sensible decision can be made any longer, without taking into account not only the world as it is, but the world as it will be.

-Isaac Asimov

We all know that we should be good at decision-making. We should be able to make decisions quickly and correctly in order to not feel regretful for taking the wrong decisions. We know that we should listen to our own self only when making a decision. We also know that we should not worry about what people will think of our decision and what they will talk about it. But do we know how will our decision, whether big or small, affect the people who are close to us?

   Whichever decision you take, you need to consider how it will affect the people around you. You don’t need to worry about what they will think of you or what they will talk about you, but make sure you know how your decision affects them — positively, negatively or not at all. Why is this important? Let’s see.

   Decision-making is a skill everyone must be adept at in which one must understand all of its aspects. One of its key principles is clearly understanding the consequences of your actions. It is immensely important to understand this because the consequences might not seem big at first, but may cause confusion and mayhem afterwards which might be difficult to handle. Some people may be hurt by your decision and may feel let down as you didn’t consider their feelings about your decision, thus breaking an important connection in your life.  So, what do you think is better — understanding the consequences or handling the chaos?

   The consequences that you need to understand differ person to person. For someone it might be beneficial and for someone, not so good. So, you need to talk to and understand each person’s perspective on your decision. In this, you need to know how they feel your decision will affect them and whether they will gain or lose something and how. This kind of direct and precise questioning to each person who is in your inner circle will prove effective and beneficial for you. 

   Now that you know the consequences, sort them out. Find out which are good, bad or neutral. From that, you can derive the overall effect of your actions on the people around you. If it is positive and beneficial for most of the people, then it is well and good. But, don’t let down the people whom it will negatively affect. Talk more to them and understand their perspective even better to gain a deeper understanding of why they feel they are at a loss. After full comprehension, turn the situation around. Take the reasons they provided and turn them into positives maintaining a confident note. You will render them a new perspective to look at this situation differently. 

   There is something important to understand here — if your decision is very small which doesn’t bring substantial change, then there is no need to go around asking how it will affect other people. Yes, if you are changing the place you live in or the place you work in, then you need to consider the effect it will have on your colleagues or family members. If you have decided to take up an expensive, time-consuming course in the field you want to specialise in, you can’t just blindly go for it without even considering the effect of your decision on your family members, can you? No, you can’t. You need to understand how it will impact your family both financially and emotionally. You need to understand how your household will be impacted with such a long absence of yours and increased financial burden due to the cost of the course. You need to take all of this into consideration along with the additional responsibilities and tasks other family members will need to bear. Consider all the pros and cons, not just for yourself, but for the people who will be affected as well.

   Learning this important skill will help you tremendously in decision-making. You will not be confused and you will not have to bear any negative consequences. Another way in which you will benefit from this is that it will refine your decision. You decide you want to do something because from your position you may only be able to see the benefits, but when you take in the perspective of people affected by your decision, you will get the third person perspective on your decision that will help you see the whole picture, rather than a specific, highlighted part of it. Once you see the whole picture, you will understand the positives and negatives of your choice and then analyse it. After that, if you see that the negatives are more than the positives for you, then it is better not to take an action that supports this flawed decision. If the positives are more than the negatives, then you can continue. If it is 50/50, then it will be upto you to take the risk or not. 

   When you understand how to make the right decisions, you will be able to filter out chaos, confusion and regret easily. You will feel more happy and less distressed. It is all up to you, either to choose chaos, regret and distress or to choose simplicity, clarity and happiness…